What happens when you lose your motivation?

What happens when you lose your motivation?

It’s difficult to place a finger on exactly when you lose your creative inspiration, your motivation.

Does it happen after a particularly tough day at work? After a challenging conversation with a family member or friend? Or does it come suddenly out of the blue? Is it seasonal?

Seriously, what happens when you lose your motivation?

Slowly, it starts to creep into your everyday habits.

Your daily morning workout turns into, a few times a week. You stop going out on weekdays. Your reading material has fallen into a pattern of catching up on tweets and Instagram posts instead of the latest Times bestseller or independent poet from your local bookshop. You stop writing. You actually crave weekends without leaving your house.

Are you currently all of these things?

Me too. Not only am I slowly losing most of my creative motivation, I’m quite possibly becoming a hermit.

Over the past few weeks, I thought I’d stumbled out of this motivational mess. I stayed on track throughout August by smashing workouts and a badass ‘let’s get shit done’ mentality, which carried on through the start of September.

Then something happened.

Except actually, nothing happened.

I woke up one morning and thought, I’ll skip the workout, what could it hurt? I’ll pass on writing that blog post tonight, I’ll leave it for tomorrow (cue a Groundhog Day effect of saying this over and over on repeat) I’ll skip on lunch, because (shock, surprise) I haven’t had a spare second to do a food shop. I’ll let myself get envious of others. All of these nothings start adding up into something. And this something just not cool at all.

Unmotivated. Lazy. Uninspired. Jealous.  

I’m having one of those moments where it feels like time keeps speeding up. I’m in a reverse Time Turner of sorts and the clock keeps whizzing forward and I’m standing still.

I feel like I’m missing things. I’m rushing constantly from place to place, task to task. I’m even forgetting to enjoy morning coffee. Yes, seriously. There’s no time to sip and enjoy. It’s a sip, panic to find clothes from the wash bin and bam, get out the door and get moving.

And I’ve strangely started comparing myself to others. People who’ve been writing for years, established novelists, rising stars, and I’m quite literally, pitying myself. I’m throwing myself this horrific lack of motivation pity party.

When did it get like this? When did I lose my motivation?

I need some headspace to clear my brain and get creative again. I need time to sleep, to unwind, to motivate myself again. I feel like I’ve let my writing get stale and that’s not okay with me. I miss being a passionate articulate writer… and looking it seems like it hasn’t been that way for quite some time. I need to stop comparing myself to what others are doing. I need to read a book. Slowly sip on some tea. Maybe get some sleep. A holiday in the countryside sounds like a great idea right now. I need to focus on me.

Because after all, what happens when you lose your motivation?

Well, you’ve got to come back fighting.

Kelly xoxo